Fragments of dreamtime in the middle of summer.:
No rain for days, then a sprinkle – somehow the absence of water and then its presence causes anxiety
When you can smell wet wood in a house this also causes anxiety.
My power of smell has been heightened lately – perhaps due to the cessation of smoking. The sense of smell is the most powerful one – it is directly connected to our old brain. We perceive the world with our eyes and say it is a world of this shape at this XYZ axis moving thusly. But with smell we use the canvas of our minds to paint the picture that is told to us by odor.
Odor is molecules of a substance left behind. Molecules comes into our nose. Smelling and eating are closely related. Very intimate sense.
Today I dig down. Life is that membrane I dig through. It is a huge act, to change the skin of the earth. As modern humans, we are wildly nonchalant about digging.
Perhaps the key word is “respect” which is closely related to “empathy”. If our urge is to connect and be part of the larger picture, maybe we need to discard the notion that we are not everything already, that we are that thing that is out there, or we have been, or consider that thing deserves as much empathy as we do.
To live like the aboriginal people who respected the land – is this just a dream now?
Economy – from the Greek for “household management”.
The issues that come with the every day economics of living as a self-employed farmer has been weighing on me of late. There are so many things to manage as a farmer, and for some reason creating a home to live in and taking care of my most important relationships seem to fall to the bottom of the list. This spring I decided that this was completely backwards. It was time to do a 180.
I need to work on my important relationships and my home in order to be a happy person, and THEN I can become a good manager of our farm. I had thought that with endless effort to improve and build our farm business we would arrive at a place of domestic bliss at some distant point in the future, but I have found so far that it is of primary importance to consciously work toward that bliss regardless of what my circumstances may be at any given moment. I also have to give myself time to do what I love, to relax and let go of all that I cling to so hard, the problems I see and the negative things that dwell in my subconscious mind. Working on myself is the best thing I can do for my wife or for the farm.
Work is good. Working my ass off is great, but so is having fun. Without that release, I am in imbalance – tension is held until it all blows up in my face. When I say goodbye to the tension, I continue onward with a lighter heart. Of course, more tensions arise and bad things happen, but it really does work out in the end.
As a meditator, I know that it is helpful to watch my emotions and thoughts pass through me, and realize that I am not them, they are not me. This was such an enlightening breakthrough for me, back in my twenties. When you meditate, you see the whirlpool inside and it is pretty amazing that we can ever get outside of that. But if we do for even a few moments, our whole self becomes refreshed.
That is what it comes down to – how to refresh the household, how to refresh our lives.
If I work on refreshing at least one thing a day, I can work my way toward that bliss.